Health & Fitness - The Real Facts

[HuntingInMaine]

Finally, some health and fitness answers that make sense!

Health & Fitness - The Real Facts:

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it..........don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy
vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa beans ... another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape! Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets and remember, "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - strawberries in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming - WOO HOO! What a Ride!"

[Finn]

Now, that's a fitness progam I like!

[buckee]

Makes sense to me ...well,...kind of...LOL

[Andrea]

LOL. Thanks for that newsflash!!!! Guess I can haul all my exercise equipment to the dump, along with my weight bench. Oh yeah...and I am sick of cleaning the pool....so now I can just fill it in too.

Thanks Linda!!!! Milkshake and fries anyone????

[JimT]

[billygoat]

Linda, I know this isn't your fitness routine! lol!

[turkeygirl]

LOL! I took Exercise Physiology last semester and even made my own work-out routine so don't get me started,lmbo!

[HuntingInMaine]

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Linda, I know this isn't your fitness routine! lol!

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No, it isn't....but that plan sounds a lot easier and more fun than what I'm doing now!

[JimT]

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Linda, I know this isn't your fitness routine! lol!

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No, it isn't....but that plan sounds a lot easier and more fun than what I'm doing now!

[/ QUOTE ]

How can that be better than doing nothing?

[HuntingInMaine]

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How can that be better than doing nothing?

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Nothing????? Fishing is very hard work....reeling in all those big fish really works the arms..... And in November I'll be dragging another monster buck.....

[billygoat]

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And in November I'll be dragging another monster buck.....

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Likely story! You and Amy both know those deer were once in a lifetime! You just might have to settle for a spike this year!

[JimT]

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How can that be better than doing nothing?

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Nothing????? Fishing is very hard work....reeling in all those big fish really works the arms..... And in November I'll be dragging another monster buck.....

[/ QUOTE ] I have seen the fish you catch. They aint much to them .lmao. Your son probably dragged your buck out....HA! Time to fess up about your pic also. We have met remember. Nice photoshop job....

[lostiniowa]

i hope he is kidding!

[JimT]

I know Linda pretty good..She knows I am kidding around.

[HuntingInMaine]

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Likely story! You and Amy both know those deer were once in a lifetime! You just might have to settle for a spike this year!

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This year Amy and I are getting ones with the drop thingees, I put my order in too!!! Maybe if you're really nice to her, she'll help you out! LMAO