1 | Texting
Why You Suck: You can't stop texting, even while hunting.
Hyper-paranoid wild turkeys see this constant movement and they want no part of it.
Solution: Turn your phone off and hunt.
2 | Sleeping
Why You Suck: You're asleep when a gobbler cruises by silently, looking at your decoys.
Yes, it's true, sometimes catnaps at your hunting setup help recharge your batteries.
Solution: Be selective about when you rest in the turkey woods.
3 | Boredom
Why You Suck: You just don't care for all the intangible things that go into a turkey hunt.
True enough, some people like us are obsessed with turkey hunting, while others aren't.
Solution: Work in quick "flash hunts" for turkeys to keep your interest peaked.
4 | Hunger
Why You Suck: That great feed at the local diner before dawn has worn off.
You wanted to travel light, but now you're stomach is growling again. Oh, man.
Solution: Carry along snacks when you turkey hunt.
5 | Thirst
Why You Suck: "Oh man, I can't believe my water bottle is back at the truck."
You forget how important it is to bring along a thirst-quencher until . . .
Solution: Stash something to drink in the game tote of your turkey hunting vest.
6 | Patience
Why You Suck: You hardly have the patience to sit an hour at the base of a tree.
Yes, nothing seems to be happening right now, but it might in a few seconds . . .
Solution: Can't quite master turkey hunting out in the open? Get a pop-up blind.
7 | Discomfort
Why You Suck: You forgot a seat cushion. Your boots leaked.
It's hard to sit still and concentrate on turkeys with the onset of hypothermia.
Solution: Make a gear list, check it twice, and prepare for the hunt before you start.
8 | Issues
Why You Suck: You're worried about your job. You have someplace to be.
To turkey hunt well, you have to put your work and family duties on hold.
Solution: If you can, just concentrate on turkey hunting – for at least a morning if you can.
9 | Rookie
Why You Suck: You're just getting started, and frustration is setting in.
You have to start somewhere, just like every other turkey hunter.
Solution: Practice your calling. Hunt a lot. The turkeys will teach you plenty.
10 | Disruptions
Why You Suck: Other hunters move in on you. Other factors mess with your hunts.
Face it, you repeatedly hunt pressured spots, with annoying disruptions.
Solution: Pick up and find an unpressured location with birds. And good luck . . .
And when you finally kill a gobbler, some of these reasons will fade into history.
Now give thanks.
Editor's note: This blog post was first published Feb. 5, 2017.